I’m beginning to write again. Though I’ve learned a great deal in the time between my de-conversion from Christianity to my current beliefs, I have not recorded any of my intellectual evolution to this point. Only in sparse commentary on Facebook posts or Reddit boards have I revealed (in an outward manner) my worldview. I’ve been through periods of credulity, skepticism, belief, confusion, and bitterness; all locked between my ears. But recently, a trend has emerged among those people with whom I spend time. People in general seem to have, in my experience as a 31-year-old white male living in the American South, become more openminded. I acknowledge that the data set from which I draw this conclusion is based on my own unique, subjective experience in the world, so it cannot be completely generalized. But my observation of the ‘Other’ in society (anyone *other than* myself) is what leads me to this hypothesis.
At work, for example, I have slowly revealed my worldview and belief system among my coworkers, and it has been not only successful, but rewarding. Successful in the sense that I have not felt shame or anxiety in revealing that I don’t follow orthodox evangelical Christian beliefs (nor believe their metaphysical speculation), and rewarding in the discovery that many among my peers have *more* openminded and reasonable positions on a variety of topics than I had expected. I suppose my surprise is a symptom of being raised by a religious system in which true and unfaltering belief in the deity/theos/Ideal/metaphysically necessary being, or whatever you want to call it, yields salvation. There is power in this system, to be sure. And who knows if they are correct or not? They say they do know, and that they are correct, and through this system a human has purpose. This human may now be redeemed and absolved from the punishment for all wrongdoing via the deicidal, regicidal, atoning, sacrificial killing of the Son of the Creator God; Jesus the Christ. I digress ...
It is not necessarily the strict adherence and firm belief in Judeo-Christian thought which bothers me on a fundamental level. I have beliefs which require assumptions —or ‘leaps of faith’— in the absence of verifiable (in the Popperian sense) evidence. No, this is still in the range of epistemic honesty on the part of the theistic, religious person. What disturbs me in the modern incarnation of the orthodox Christian layperson is as follows:
- Their aversion to studying materials, thoughts, or ideas outside of an intellectual boundary set by their individual fear of the topics themselves or by recommendation from their local, denominational religious leadership. An anecdote comes to mind in which I ordered a copy of The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins (a popular volume on the shelves for those of us at the forefront of the so-called ‘New Atheist’ movement). My mother couldn’t believe I would epistemically trespass into the mind of one of the enemies, and she was hurt, expressing various emotions of anger and frustration; even a glimpse of sadness registered in her eyes.
- And their ability to so effectively silo off their beliefs from the scrutiny of their beliefs. The art of the commitment to the culturally accepted norms and behaviors of the group has become the indication of, and a dynamic confession to, the seriousness with which you take the belief. Attached to this mode of responding to external epistemic ‘threats’ is the expression of many traditions and behaviors far outside the purview of the belief system; constructing and rendering maintenance to insular cultures mediated through local congregations, worship services, charitable work, private schools, church community events, philanthropic donations, community outreach, and so on.
Why do I mention these things? Because in my opinion, an honest epistemic position on your beliefs necessitates careful consideration of *all* the available data sets, i.e., belief systems/worldviews. This entire appraisal of the circumstances does, however, beg the important question: Don’t there exist some Christian thinkers who are exploring such forbidden topics, or topics inaccessible to the average disinterested believer? Of course there are! I met many of them in University and Seminary where there were many wonderful people, professors, and thinkers. The issue lies when the responsibility of one’s own investigation into existential matters is outsourced to groups of academic clergy, who have made vows to a confessionally governed system of beliefs and Ideals.
The burden of responsibility to investigate matters of purpose, meaning, and spiritual significance lies solely within each individual. We maximize the utility-function of the modern American religious institution and, in so doing, have scaled the impact of the Judeo-Christian brand of beliefs, and effectively monopolized intellectual traditions, and worldview building (but isn’t there some stable equilibrium for the market of ideas to correct to and return? *rolls eyes incalculably hard*). The individual must be open to hitherto unknown data sets, including heuristics, methods, and information which may contradict their previously held intellectual commitments. You must update your priors—a wise person once said—if you want any hope of correctly predicting/appraising the probability/viability of your proposition/interpretation. And that means thinking through all degrees of freedom, including the complex and difficult ones, and especially the frightening ones.
J. Woodward
September 4, 2022
Terse.blog